I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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