..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
