that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
