it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
the liver wants what the liver wants
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Randomize
