I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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