At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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