Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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