i just google imaged poop.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Randomize
