Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Randomize
