This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
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