Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
