We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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