You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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