Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
