Grow some girl-balls and come out already
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Randomize
