That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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