tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize