Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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