Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize
