She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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