i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
