he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
