and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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