what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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