What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
