I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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