I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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