wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize