I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
