How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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