i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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