I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
