Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Randomize
