She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
I think i got beer on your cat.
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