Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize