First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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