I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize