It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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