Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
you had me at cake vodka
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
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