The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
