I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I think your dad took our porno
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
