that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
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