did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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