Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I'm at about main and main street
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
