so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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