that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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