I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Randomize
