I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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