You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
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