that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
sex in a hospital.. check
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Randomize
