We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize